Separate Closets Promise
Opposites Attract 
Opposites do in deed attract. Much like magnets, when pushed together on the wrong side, opposites can push against one another in a clash of powers. Marrying our polar opposite, and sharing the same space can be a challenge. In fact, I recently wrote about one challenge my husband and I have dealt with that can cause arguments. It is the clash of the “messy” spouse vs. “tidy” spouse.
One definition for marriage defines it as “a combination or mixture of two or more elements.” Precisely what marriage accomplishes. We combine and mix finances, living space, and family traditions. Most married people know full well that sharing is the name of the game in Holy matrimony. Joining everything and sharing bonds us together. With one exception, closet space.
Welcome to “His” Closet
Close your eyes and stroll with me into the fairy tale land. The sun is always shining, birds chirping, and music seems to ride on the wind. Everything in the land aptly named “his” is beautiful, clean, and perfect.
In the land of clean and orderly, the floor is always spotless, the door opens unimpeded, and nothing is ever out of place. All his shoes line up and face the same direction. He sorts our laundry hamper. He arranges his closet shelves where everything is in plain view, turned forward, and the picture of perfect order. Most people cram stuff onto shelves in no particular order. Not him!
As if the shelves are not enough, his hanging clothes are a strategically planned department store. All his pants hang on one side of the closet, and shirts on the other (seasonally arranged and color-coded to boot). Even his belts and ties hang in strict formation on hooks. No stitch of clothing, or item, is out of place, EVER! God forbid if you find anything just tossed on the floor. Pretty sure that would only happen if he ceased to exist.
“Her” Closet: Enter at Your Own Risk
Oh, the glory of separate closets. The one place I can leave a holy mess without worrying about making someone else completely crazy. If you think the junk drawer in the house is chaotic, my closet is the place of nightmares for my darling husband. To him, “it is a lovely room of death!” On that note alone I never, I mean NEVER, leave the door open.
In my “room of death,” I have boxes and random items crammed on all the shelves built into my closet. In one corner of the floor lay countless numbers of bags and purses (packed like sardines), old books, and random unknown items. Come to think of it; I am not even sure WHAT lives under all my hanging clothes!
Stacks and Stacks
Along with my stacks of items, I have an extensive collection of yarn is haphazardly stuffed into plastic bins. It is not uncommon to find my clothes draped and piled everywhere. I wedge my shoes onto shelves or shove them into baskets. My laundry basket always holds a huge pile of clean clothes on top of it. Heck! I am lucky if the door will open without being stopped in its tracks from the clothes I tossed on the floor after changing for the day. Laundry day saves those pieced of clothing at some point.
After my stoic hubby finishes the family laundry, he stacks them on top of the laundry basket inside the door of my room of chaos. He does not have to see a thing past that point. He stacks it. And stacks it. And STACKS IT! Most of the clothes he stacks will stay in that pile sometimes for 3-4 weeks. Admittedly, I dig through that pile for clothes to wear on a daily basis. Yes. I wear them wrinkled.
Pretty sure a closet monster lives in there. This haunts my hubs and is probably one the reasons he never enters. He may never make it out alive!
Separate Closets Saves Marriages
Compromise
My fiancé and I just moved into a bigger apartment and I was very unsure of where to put my clothes. She has about 10 times the amount clothing that I do with more arriving in the mail seemingly on a daily basis. I was conflicted on whether to carve out a small space in the master closet or to take the guest closet down the hall. I didn’t want to make it seem like we were drifting apart with our separate closets, since in this bigger place we also now also have separate sinks which for me are a godsend. I was feeling guilty for wanting to keep my stuff In a separate closet since I know that her mess will always infiltrate into my area if we share a closet. I appreciate your insight and am glad I’m not alone.